OPEN BAR: it rubs the lotion on the skin or it gets the hose again

[Suu]

Stupid customer asks something stupid question of the day:

"Hi, I know you only sew stuff, but since you do these things, do you know what gauge old chainmail was? Thanks."

I do "these things" but one of them isn't knitting steel. The husbandthing fights in a full chain set that he paid a lot of fucking money for, because it's a full flat wedge riveted set that is designed to take hits, Richter fought in chain for a while before also. This is some guy who's about to ask me if I make chainmail, and if I do, can I do it from aluminum rings you buy in the jewelry section at Joann's, because he doesn't want to pay the $500+ for a combat grade hauberk.

I'm letting this one stew for a bit, if he even gets an answer at all.

See, this is what I was talking about.

I need to invent the internet slap, only rather than a slap, it's an electrical shock that passes through the keyboard or mouse of the intended victim just long enough to fry some capillaries and teach them a valuable fucking lesson.

[Reginald Ret]

Stupid customer asks something stupid question of the day:

"Hi, I know you only sew stuff, but since you do these things, do you know what gauge old chainmail was? Thanks."

I do "these things" but one of them isn't knitting steel. The husbandthing fights in a full chain set that he paid a lot of fucking money for, because it's a full flat wedge riveted set that is designed to take hits, Richter fought in chain for a while before also. This is some guy who's about to ask me if I make chainmail, and if I do, can I do it from aluminum rings you buy in the jewelry section at Joann's, because he doesn't want to pay the $500+ for a combat grade hauberk.

I'm letting this one stew for a bit, if he even gets an answer at all.

See, this is what I was talking about.

I need to invent the internet slap, only rather than a slap, it's an electrical shock that passes through the keyboard or mouse of the intended victim just long enough to fry some capillaries and teach them a valuable fucking lesson.

Write some clickbait and link them to one of those pornsites that open 100+ windows with horrible porn at extreme volumes.

[Salty]

I'VE GOT OPTIMISM BLEEDING OUT MY ASSHOLE LIKE THE ELEVATOR IN THE SHINING.

FUCK YOU, ENTROPY, FEEL THE WRATH OF MY UNSTOPPABLE MEAT!

[Suu]

I JUST HAD ANOTHER ONE I WANTED TO SLAP.

Goddamnit, It's like I've been FUCKING ENLIGHTENED.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

I JUST HAD ANOTHER ONE I WANTED TO SLAP.

Goddamnit, It's like I've been FUCKING ENLIGHTENED.

My work here is done.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

I'VE GOT OPTIMISM BLEEDING OUT MY ASSHOLE LIKE THE ELEVATOR IN THE SHINING.

FUCK YOU, ENTROPY, FEEL THE WRATH OF MY UNSTOPPABLE MEAT!

Stealing that.

[Salty]

I'VE GOT OPTIMISM BLEEDING OUT MY ASSHOLE LIKE THE ELEVATOR IN THE SHINING.

FUCK YOU, ENTROPY, FEEL THE WRATH OF MY UNSTOPPABLE MEAT!

Stealing that.

That's only fair, I've stolen plenty of yours, 

[Cain]

Alty, it was a noble effort on DS2014, but of course, only Paul Pepper is going to bother to answer seriously.

[Salty]

Alty, it was a noble effort on DS2014, but of course, only Paul Pepper is going to bother to answer seriously.

Yeah. But, hey, at least this way my smug contempt is fully justified.

[Salty]

le sigh

[Salty]

My day is full of wasted effort apparently. Tried calling around to offer up cheap rental space, dildos all the way down. I shall focus instead on making enough money so I don't need to rent out at all and have a separate work room and office.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Alty, it was a noble effort on DS2014, but of course, only Paul Pepper is going to bother to answer seriously.

I like that guy.  Do we know him here, or is he strictly FB?

[Salty]

Shit stirring post=100+ views, comments to match.
Genuine attempt to gather feedback about actual effort=34 views, 20 comments, mostly from me and Roger.

[East Coast Hustle]

Rare (for this time of year) beautiful sunny day here in the PNW. Took ECHGF and the dogs for a leisurely drive up Whidbey Island and over Deception Pass with a stop at Sweet D's Shrimp Shack for some fried oysters and jumbo prawns. Tonight we've got 2nd row seats for the Everett Silvertips game (minor league hockey, which is secretly the best sports thing to see in person) thanks to the company I work for which I may be about to abandon pending the contents of my inbox which contains a message from my old and possibly future boss, presumably telling me whether or not he is willing to pitch in for the cost of the move. I'm a little too nervous to actually check the message right now, given that it's got the potential to be seriously life-changing.

[Salty]

Haha, one of my renters just informed me she A. Cut two tendons on her finger and B. Does not have rent for the March.


HAHAHA. Why, in the name of fuck did I take over this lease? I am now awfully fucked for the near future. Proper fucked.