Fuck You, Starbucks

[AFK]

If they're good enough for Sonic Youth they're good enough for me.

[potato]

I used to be a barista and owned my own place, so I think I'm qualified to say that Starbucks has completely removed the art of brewing from their success equation. they are the mcdonald's of "gourmet" coffee.

I frequented them for a while for lack of other choices. I occasionally frequent them now when I need a quick shot of something and I can't go to a preferred provider for whatever reason.

there are lots of places who do it better than Starbucks. a lot of the little stands you see on street corners are owned and worked by people who love coffee way more than your average Starbucks employee (or apparently by Starbucks itself, since as a corporation it has solidly moved its offerings into the "mediocre" category).

[Corvidia]

Ahyup. Starbucks pretty much sucks these days. I trust them with my espresso, if I can't do it at home, because the only local coffee shop they didn't drive out frequently lets their shots die and don't believe me when I tell them 10 seconds is the MAXIMUM that you can let it sit.

[potato]

yeah, that gets under my skin, too.

[potato]

seriously, it's not hard.
1. prep your grinds.
2. start steaming.
3. when you hear the milk getting hot, hit the brew button (I'm lucky to have some places that hand-pull, so they do it a little different).
4. watch the goddam crema for fuck's sake, because if you didn't tamp it perfectly it could overbrew.
5. pour everything in quick succession, because if you timed it right, it's all done at once, and if you're any good, you can handle that.

[Cain]

I actually cannot think of a single decent coffee shop

Starbucks - dealt with ITT
Costa - too expensive
Caffe Nero - hit and miss coffee, good service, strange drink sizes, sucky chocolate drinks

The local ones are little better in terms of quality, but are at least more accurately priced.

[potato]

I'm afraid I may have derailed the thread, I'm sorry. I went off ranting about the departure from the art of brewing, but I kinda feel it's part of the problem with starbucks in general. they've just gone completely corporate, while pretending to be your little neighborhood coffee place, and the people are flocking like sheep while ignoring the locally owned shop 1 block away that serves a better cup (but whose employees face similar problems, for different reasons).

[Corvidia]

Hey, no worries.
Agreed, it's really not hard to make a decent latte. I do it like you discussed, Potato, and yet so many others just fail.

[Aufenthatt]

It makes me lul that a place like starbucks which exists mainly on the pretence of being a coffee house serves such shitty coffee.

One of my friends got the recipie for frapachinos (or something else I can't spell) and spent one morning handing out free ones outside of a starbucks they built into our local stadium, as luck would have it, some very serious important people from starbucks were being shown there new slave camp retail outlet by the clubs directors. He got very angrly told to get off their property, so he moved 15 yards and set up shop on the pavement.

[LMNO]

I actually cannot think of a single decent coffee shop

Starbucks - dealt with ITT
Costa - too expensive
Caffe Nero - hit and miss coffee, good service, strange drink sizes, sucky chocolate drinks

The local ones are little better in terms of quality, but are at least more accurately priced.

Coffee is something that is so simple, it's incredibly easy to fuck up in large amounts.

[Corvidia]

It makes me lul that a place like starbucks which exists mainly on the pretence of being a coffee house serves such shitty coffee.

One of my friends got the recipie for frapachinos (or something else I can't spell) and spent one morning handing out free ones outside of a starbucks they built into our local stadium, as luck would have it, some very serious important people from starbucks were being shown there new slave camp retail outlet by the clubs directors. He got very angrly told to get off their property, so he moved 15 yards and set up shop on the pavement.

I believe it's "frappuchino."  Either way, it's a shitty drink. :P Reeeevolting amounts of high fructose corn syrup. I hope they didn't chase your friend for the recipe source--that's potentially corporate espionage charges right there.
Kudos to him though.

LMNO, I have no idea how people screw it up either. I'm still not very picky about my coffee (unless it's Kona, in which case it damn well better be 100% Kona and fresh) so I don't give a shit about filtered water or grind, unless its espresso or Turkish, and I'll drink day old coffee. And yet, people still manage to give me sludge in a cup. Ugh. Brunt coffee or espresso is the WORST.
At this point, I just say fuckit and brew it cold, since you pretty much can't screw that up and it tastes better anyway. Hell, I can drink the boldest Indonesian coffee* black if I cold brew it.

_{*Bold Indonesian coffee (ie Sumatra) tastes like an ashtray.}

[Aufenthatt]

I don't drink coffee, but I do get a buzz walking into small coffee houses run by hippies and ordering "frappuchino"s just to watch the discusted looks.

Aufenthatt
Both discusting and contributing to the counter culture since 1673

[potato]

I don't drink coffee, but I do get a buzz walking into small coffee houses run by hippies and ordering "frappuchino"s just to watch the discusted looks.

you're a horrible person.

[Epimetheus]

If you don't expect them to treat you like shit, you haven't been paying attention for the last 15 years.

Or the last 150 years.

[Cramulus]

If you don't expect them to treat you like shit, you haven't been paying attention for the last 15 years.

Or the last 150 years.

woah, long time no see epi. wb.