Category Archives: Lulz

Go Go Goddess Motorcycle!

Sick of the Flying Spaghetti Monster being the only Neophillic Irreligion available for kids? Here’s a quick jake for the children.

hxxp://www.gogoddess.com/

Some background on the site, from the PARENTS section:

Why go goddess?
Rather than by age, tweens are best defined by their state of mind as they enter a transition period between childhood and adolescence. go goddess! is a brand focusing exclusively on the development of self-esteem for tween girls by encouraging self-discovery, self-expression, and self-awareness. The purpose of the go goddess! concept is to encourage tweens to discover their talents and interests, and to emphasize the importance of embracing their inner beauty and unique attitudes as they navigate the tough world of being a tween.

Why focus on tweens?
Experts suggest that it is during the tween years that girls begin to pay attention to their “inner voice.” They begin to compare themselves to their peers, which can result in self-doubt. “Tween-agers” also begin to question their individual idea of what is right and what is wrong, rather than solely relying on their parents’ opinions. The intent of the go goddess! concept is to provide girls with a healthy outlet to explore their unique and budding interests during this impressionable period.

consider the above when writing letters.

If you sign up, play nice on the site, there are kids there. But go ahead and try every trick in the book to get them to take us seriously.

(credit to Lysergic for finding this joint)

PS: I DON’T EVEN HAVE A DAUGHTER!

I think I may be in love…

And that is not something I say lightly. But then again, its not every day I find a cam-whoring, ex-stripper, who trolls for cash…and so, having done so, I find her somewhat fascinating.

For those of you who don’t have a finger on the pulse of mainstream/left-wing blogging in the UK, I am talking of the delectable Ruth Fowler. She of Comment is Free infamy. Over the last week or so, she has pretty much managed to wind up much of the UK left wing blogosphere. Well, at least the parts of it I have visited.

And when you look at some of her articles, it is not hard to see why she has caused such a stir. Here are a few selected articles and their subtitles, links provided.

The antichrist for feminists

There I was, thinking I was just making a quick buck, when all the time I was illustrating that feminism is about choice

Club rules
Lefties are supposed to be the nice ones. But increasingly, liberals are just puritanical hypocrites

Flab isn’t fab
You don’t get fat by accident. Eating so much requires Olympic-class stamina and athleticism

And imagine lobbing these into the sort of people who frequent the Guardian for anything except entertainment. Well, actually you don’t even have to, just read the comments below the article. Yeah, precisely, its hilarious and designed to do only 2 things:

wind people up
get her name better known (for her book)

And of course, it does help that Ms Fowler is not only getting paid to troll, which is enough to earn my respect, and is fairly intelligent and well-read, which catches my interest. She is also quite the looker. Here is one of the more…work safe pictures from her site (although most of them are fairly tasteful, so if your employers have a liberal policy, feel free to sneak a look).

Yeah, precisely. I shall have to watch her future articles very closely, I think. I love a trouble-maker, especially of her potential.

X-Day: Anonymous vs. Scientology

Pungenday, Discord 28, YoLD 3174
A new spin on Mafia, by Pope Telarus, KSC, Tender to the Edible Zen Garden.

The Cards:

X-Day Card: Anonymous X-Day Card: Scientologist

X-Day Card: Bob X-Day Card: Alien Sex Goddess

“The portrait of J.R. “Bob” Dobbs is a trademark of SubGenius Foundation, Inc. and is used with permission.”

Continue reading X-Day: Anonymous vs. Scientology

Rev. What’s-His-Name?’s Funnay of the Week

I went to my favorite pub with my buddy Chuck.  We sat down and ordered our favorite adult beverages.  Chuck then noticed a very familiar brown substance on the bar with a very familiar and rank odor.  We asked the bartender if had noticed it, hoping he would clean it up.  The Bartender looked puzzled, “I have no idea of what you two are talking about.  I don’t see anything.”

In unison we remarked, “Bar-stool, Motherfucker!”

The Illegitimate Son of Convention

3972959.jpgGreetings friend.  Rev. What’s-His-Name here to put in a plug for one of my favorite musical artists, The Illegitmate Son of Convention.  Okay, okay, yeah, it’s my “band.”  It consists of me, me, and sometimes I.

 I thought some of you cats would be interested in it.  The name kind of gives away what the project is all about.  Mainstream music, especially in America, tends to follow a rather vanilla formula.  When it comes to performing and recording music, I’m interested in going off in different directions and exploring different territories.  Like pairing up a Nose Flute with a distorted guitar.  Pairing an African Kalimba with a House beat.  Playing rhythm and blues on a Melodica.  And so on.

 Another thing I’ve done occassionally with this project is to do some Discordian recordings.  I’ve done a couple now where I’ve paired a spoken rant with some musics.  My favorite so far has been my track Memed And Brusied/So What Now?  The “So What Now?” refers to a great piece that pd.comer Thurnez Isa wrote.  I loved the imagery of it and felt compelled to surround it with some heavy guitar riffing. 

 You can check that tune out and others on three different sites.  First the MySpace site, www.myspace.com/theillegitimatesonofconvention  I also have a site on Multiply, you can stream the songs but they have caught a case of suck and fail and no longer allow downloads, but anyway it’s at rwhn.multiply.com  Lastly, I’ve set up shop at Last.fm, www.last.fm There you can download all of my tracks.  I have no interest in making any money off of my music (although I do have some merch at CafePress, let me know if by chance you are interested), I just enjoy making it and releasing it to the interwebs.  So, check it out, tell me what you think. 

 Ta ta for now.  

23 Things to Amuse Yourself While You Wait

Here is a PDF which can be printed as a tri-fold pamphlet. It contains subversive thought about robots, cabbages, and Discordians.

23 Things to Amuse Yourself While You Wait

(also available in .doc so you can edit it for your own purposes)

This pamphlet is designed to be left in places where people will read it while bored. Leave them on trains, busses, the stops associated with both, waiting rooms, or anywhere where people have a little bit of time and are bored.

If you’re feeling evangelical, you can even hand them to strangers. Personally, I like to carry around some to trade with other people who are handing out propaganda.

Reptilian shapeshifters!

As I’m sure many of you remember, we at PD.com have had more than a couple of run-ins with people who believe in the shapeshifting reptilians that supposedly rule the world.  While it’s a very amusing conspiracy theory, and was certainly hilarious back in the 90s, in these dark days of rendition, torture and war, it seems more of a distraction from some of the real problems of the world than anything else, although that is a rant for another day.

That said, it is still good for a laugh when the world is getting you down.  And fortunately, Tracey Twyman has managed to link to a fair few of videos purporting to show shapeshifting famous people, on YouTube.  I laughed especially hard at the David Icke one, I have to admit.

The common failing of all would-be political agitators

“Centurion, why do they titter so?”
“Just some…uh, Jewish joke, sir.”

– The Life of Brian

I have never made but one prayer to God, a very short one: “O Lord make my enemies ridiculous.” And God granted it.
– Voltaire

I’ve noticed something of a trend when it comes to politics.  And that is that people think they can use half-assed political slogans along with some pathetic emotional appeal to try and sway peoples opinions.  For example, look at the common refrain from the morons at Democratic Underground: “Bush lied, people died.”

OK, it is pretty much true, as a trend.  If we take the name Bush to cover his administration appointments, including those in the Office of Special Plans (who doctored evidence in the run up to the Iraq war), you have a case.  But does just mindlessly shouting it across the political debating forums of the internet actually convince anyone to forego their support of the Administration?  I’d be very surprised if it did.  Rather, it makes the supporters of the pro-abortion War Party look almost as mindless as the supporters of the anti-abortion War Party, which puts off any freethinking individual and reduces both sides to shouting pre-made soundbites at each other.  I mean, really.  You could script robots to do this shit.

And its not just in America.  Anywhere there is someone who is, on the face of it, is pretty much a complete and utter asshole, those who dislike them try to paint them as Satan incarnate.  It doesn’t matter if this is Hugo Chavez, Putin or Blair.  Same reasoning applies, show them to be powerful, yet utterly evil.

Does anyone actually fall for that shit?  Really?

Because to me, it looks like those on the other side are just affirming the power of the person they hate, from an opposite direction.  Powerful people will always have vocal supporters, simply because being on side with those in power has many rewards.  The moral character, or lack of it, is rarely questioned along the entire political spectrum, what with people being convinced their own political ideology is the only moral one.

Lets face it, if you really want to cut someone down to size, you have to make them a figure of fun.

Its the only antidote to emotionally fuelled political debate, which is 90% of all debate nowadays.  Instead of affirming the object of your dislike is powerful, you portray him as a bumbling fool.  You highlight the hilarious inconsistencies in their thinking, and you then convince people around you to laugh at them.  Never directly engage in so-called debates on the pros and cons of any given policy, instead concentrate on using those policies as ammunition against that person.

I know what you’re going to say.  “But people have already tried this Cain, and it hasn’t worked.”  Well I disagree, they haven’t tried hard enough.  Look at those ridiculous Bushisms people, for example.  The book turned from halfway amusing into textual analysis of policy in about 10 pages.  There was no cutting edge to it, there was no satire.  It was just the idiotic sayings of a man who commanded the world’s most powerful military.  The world has seen Caligula’s before now.  The only way they laughed at them is in a helpless “well, we’re fucked now” way.  There was no opposition, no defiance.

There is an old American proverb, “use your wit as a shield, and not as a dagger.”  Its one I totally disagree with.  Use your wit precisely as you would a dagger.  Back in the bad old days of the Hashishin, an acolyte would be given only a dagger, to make a public execution of the cult’s enemies.  Almost always, they struck in the most public place possible, in the most public way possible.  Friday, outside the mosque, with everyone watching.

That is exactly the attitude a competent political agitator should take.  If you can’t mock them to their face, perhaps you should take up a safer past time, like jogging?  Cut them down to size.  Make them a figure of ridicule.  Try to move outside party based bullshit, make their supporters look like idiots by association.

A person who is widely considered a laughing stock is not going to command respect, regardless of how much power they have.  And in an age where substance is nothing and image is everything, in such an age, humour is king.