Author Topic: FUCKING ORANGE EATING CONTEST  (Read 109839 times)

Freeky

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Re: FUCKING ORANGE EATING CONTEST
« Reply #870 on: January 17, 2012, 08:21:24 pm »
Next time, we first ask Eris to SURPRISE US.

Also, I'm still wondering who Dingus Thingus Rurouzaru is? Anyone we know but changed their name? The account's pretty old? Placid Dingo perhaps? And did he REALLY eat 23 oranges? He should at least get honorary second.

Whomever ate the most oranges wins.

You don't win the Indy 500 by smashing your car into the stands.  I mean, that's a win in anybody's book, but you didn't win the race.

No, there's been two kinds of wins each time we've done this.  Nigel ate the most the first two times and won that way, and the first time Cram also won by shitting his pance at work.  The second time Cainad won because he puked and then kept going.

So Rurozaru, if he really ate 23 oranges, won by eating hte most, and Net won by puking blood.
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Cramulus

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Re: FUCKING ORANGE EATING CONTEST
« Reply #871 on: January 17, 2012, 08:22:20 pm »
Maybe next time y'all should try something that won't make you sick

WHERE IS THE FUN IN THAT??

The Good Reverend Roger

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Re: FUCKING ORANGE EATING CONTEST
« Reply #872 on: January 17, 2012, 08:22:53 pm »
Maybe next time y'all should try something that won't make you sick

WHERE IS THE FUN IN THAT??

Outside of the ER?
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Dysfunctional Cunt

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Re: FUCKING ORANGE EATING CONTEST
« Reply #873 on: January 17, 2012, 08:23:22 pm »
Maybe next time y'all should try something that won't make you sick

WHERE IS THE FUN IN THAT??

My bad.  I didn't realize THAT was the goal....  :lulz:

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Re: FUCKING ORANGE EATING CONTEST
« Reply #874 on: January 17, 2012, 08:23:51 pm »
The first time around, Cram shit his pance.

The second time, Nigel proved she is UberFrau.

Now, Net pukes blood and is hospitalized.

HOW DO WE TOP OURSELVES NEXT TIME?

If you guys weren't such wimps you'd join me in the Grape Eating Contest.
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Dysfunctional Cunt

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Re: FUCKING ORANGE EATING CONTEST
« Reply #875 on: January 17, 2012, 08:24:51 pm »
The first time around, Cram shit his pance.

The second time, Nigel proved she is UberFrau.

Now, Net pukes blood and is hospitalized.

HOW DO WE TOP OURSELVES NEXT TIME?

If you guys weren't such wimps you'd join me in the Grape Eating Contest.

See now I could eat a shit ton of grapes if they were so damned expensive.  Especially if credit were given for juice...  :lulz:

Phox

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Re: FUCKING ORANGE EATING CONTEST
« Reply #876 on: January 17, 2012, 09:12:10 pm »
The first time around, Cram shit his pance.

The second time, Nigel proved she is UberFrau.

Now, Net pukes blood and is hospitalized.

HOW DO WE TOP OURSELVES NEXT TIME?

If you guys weren't such wimps you'd join me in the Grapefruit Eating Contest.
Seriously how i read that the first time. To which I say a hearty "You're fucking on!"

As for grapes, I would also be down. Though they would harder to keep accurate counts of. THAT'S PART OF THE CHALLENGE!  :lulz:

The Good Reverend Roger

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Re: FUCKING ORANGE EATING CONTEST
« Reply #877 on: January 17, 2012, 09:17:50 pm »
The only good thing that came of this was that we turned Waffle Iron into a Murriken by means of senseless gluttony.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
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Elder Iptuous

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Re: FUCKING ORANGE EATING CONTEST
« Reply #878 on: January 17, 2012, 09:20:55 pm »
why isn't this by weight anyways?
it's not like there isn't a scale right there at the point of purchase for the stuff....
i mean, i might participate in the next bout of Pyrrhic citrus glory, but i specialize in clementine guzzling.  it would hardly be fair of me to count each of those diminutive pearls of pH punishment on the level with the hulking and clumsy navel cannonballs....

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Re: FUCKING ORANGE EATING CONTEST
« Reply #879 on: January 17, 2012, 09:24:50 pm »
why isn't this by weight anyways?

For the same reason the Aztecs didn't measure human sacrifice in fluid ounces, despite there being buckets everywhere.

"I ate fucking 10 god damn oranges WHAT? WHAT?" is way more bad ass than "Pip pip, I politely consumed 4 kilograms of oranges minus, if you don't count the inedible rinds. Goodness!"

Phox

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Re: FUCKING ORANGE EATING CONTEST
« Reply #880 on: January 17, 2012, 09:32:02 pm »
why isn't this by weight anyways?
it's not like there isn't a scale right there at the point of purchase for the stuff....
i mean, i might participate in the next bout of Pyrrhic citrus glory, but i specialize in clementine guzzling.  it would hardly be fair of me to count each of those diminutive pearls of pH punishment on the level with the hulking and clumsy navel cannonballs....
I think Valencias counted as 3/4 of a navel last time, right? So if we came up with a fair measure for Clementines...

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Re: FUCKING ORANGE EATING CONTEST
« Reply #881 on: January 17, 2012, 09:35:36 pm »
IT A GOD DAMN FUCKING ORANGE EATING CONTEST

YES, YOU COULD EAT A COMPARABLE VOLUME OF CLEMENTINES, GRAPES, STRAWBERRY DAIQUIRIS, FLINTSTONES VITAMINS, FRUIT SNACKS, EDIBLE UNDERWEAR, SNOZBERRIES, MERKINS, WHATEVER, BUT YOU WILL NOT WIN THE FUCKING FUCKING ORANGE EATING CONTEST

The Good Reverend Roger

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Re: FUCKING ORANGE EATING CONTEST
« Reply #882 on: January 17, 2012, 09:36:26 pm »
For the same reason the Aztecs didn't measure human sacrifice in fluid ounces, despite there being buckets everywhere.

 :lulz:

:potd:
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

 "Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Elder Iptuous

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Re: FUCKING ORANGE EATING CONTEST
« Reply #883 on: January 17, 2012, 09:38:08 pm »
bullshit.
you think Huitzilopochtli would be just as happy with an equal number of little pansy assed hearts, as opposed to those of some cornfed field hand? no way.
lookie here. you think this priest is holding the heart up for dramatic effect? no. he's scrutinizing for volumentric significance.

look they tallied this shit with precision!  they used a damned abacus to tell Tlaloc exactly how many cc's of blood and kilos of heart that they pulled out to offer up.

Phox

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Re: FUCKING ORANGE EATING CONTEST
« Reply #884 on: January 17, 2012, 09:39:07 pm »
IT A GOD DAMN FUCKING ORANGE EATING CONTEST

YES, YOU COULD EAT A COMPARABLE VOLUME OF CLEMENTINES, GRAPES, STRAWBERRY DAIQUIRIS, FLINTSTONES VITAMINS, FRUIT SNACKS, EDIBLE UNDERWEAR, SNOZBERRIES, MERKINS, WHATEVER, BUT YOU WILL NOT WIN THE FUCKING FUCKING ORANGE EATING CONTEST

Clementines are oranges.  :lol: