Author Topic: The Compleat Billy Chronicles (thanks to Zenpatista)  (Read 30688 times)

Doktor Howl

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Re: The Compleat Billy Chronicles (thanks to Zenpatista)
« Reply #270 on: March 21, 2019, 12:25:59 pm »
It's amazing how people fail to recognize "what are you gonna do, fire me?" is an actual thing.

It's worth mentioning that boss's boss was a man who demonstrated the Peter Principle perfectly.  He really had no clue what he was doing.  He was out half the time, and when he was in, he was surfing the internet, looking at things that pertained to his OLD job...One, say, a step below mine, but at a larger facility.

So he really didn't know what to do, and when he guessed, he was wrong.  Under the stress of the new board leaning on him (the old one just went around him) and a couple of toadies blowing smoke, he finally made an improper decision, rather than a merely incorrect decision.  At this point, my boss had to choose between propping him up, or following the law.  Things got out of hand rather quickly at that point.

I was woken up early by a text message this morning.  Half of the remaining crew quit.  This leaves the boss's boss with 6 people to run 7 day and 7 night shifts.

Life is hard.  It's harder when you refuse to grab the bull by the tail and look the facts in the face.
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Junkenstien

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Re: The Compleat Billy Chronicles (thanks to Zenpatista)
« Reply #271 on: March 27, 2019, 07:40:27 pm »
On a scale of 1 to criminal, how improper was that decision? Sounds juicy.

Also, drop the rate to reasonable but shove in fees for fucking everything under the sun. $2/step needed to be taken. As in walking step, not any kind of procedural step. $1/word spoken. Any needed goods/services are provided under a 100% markup.

I'm still dealing with constant idiocy. Today, I had to explain why a replacement motor, that is half the size and less than half the power of the previous one is not useful. And makes things like "Safe lifting weights" irrelevant because that was worked out and tested on the old motor. That was larger.

The new one will apparently get better with time. I agreed. As we all know, every machine everywhere just gets better with age. It's why people buy old second hand cars. The reliability and efficiency and all that. When I told them this they were unwilling to accept my conclusions. Someone's 75-80% likely to get hurt with this in the next few days and I'm going to laugh, not fix it and gleefully have a few long meetings with the HSE over it.


Doktor Howl

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Re: The Compleat Billy Chronicles (thanks to Zenpatista)
« Reply #272 on: March 27, 2019, 08:21:33 pm »
On a scale of 1 to criminal, how improper was that decision? Sounds juicy.

Basically it's worth 5-10 in the slammer.

Also, my boss is suing them.

Quote
Also, drop the rate to reasonable but shove in fees for fucking everything under the sun. $2/step needed to be taken. As in walking step, not any kind of procedural step. $1/word spoken. Any needed goods/services are provided under a 100% markup.

I'm still dealing with constant idiocy. Today, I had to explain why a replacement motor, that is half the size and less than half the power of the previous one is not useful. And makes things like "Safe lifting weights" irrelevant because that was worked out and tested on the old motor. That was larger.

The new one will apparently get better with time. I agreed. As we all know, every machine everywhere just gets better with age. It's why people buy old second hand cars. The reliability and efficiency and all that. When I told them this they were unwilling to accept my conclusions. Someone's 75-80% likely to get hurt with this in the next few days and I'm going to laugh, not fix it and gleefully have a few long meetings with the HSE over it.

Machines heal if you let them.  :lulz:
"And you don't stop."
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"A penny saved is a penny depreciated."
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The Johnny

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Re: The Compleat Billy Chronicles (thanks to Zenpatista)
« Reply #273 on: March 27, 2019, 10:11:26 pm »

One doesn't need to be an engineer to know that ANY mechanical device ages like fine wine  :lulz:
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Re: The Compleat Billy Chronicles (thanks to Zenpatista)
« Reply #274 on: March 27, 2019, 10:56:16 pm »
The new one will apparently get better with time. I agreed. As we all know, every machine everywhere just gets better with age. It's why people buy old second hand cars.

You can speed this maturation by having one of your minions apply a common industrial coolant (DHMO) to the motor in question.  Natrium chloride will further accelerate the process.  However, this is only effective on certain metallic components.  If there are non-rigid parts you wish to season, you may want to consider the use of "mus musculus."
"When I say 'engineering', I have unreasonable expectations.  It must - as you know - look good in PADS AND give you plenty of help ducking and weaving in meetings.  But it must also, at some distant point in time, function.  If it does not, then you must accept that you are not in fact an engineer but instead an MBA.  Hang your head in SHAME, sinner!"

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Re: The Compleat Billy Chronicles (thanks to Zenpatista)
« Reply #275 on: March 28, 2019, 07:58:28 pm »
OMG, one doesn't simply fire the resident supervillain, it's like they've never read a comic book in their life.

Doktor Howl

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Re: The Compleat Billy Chronicles (thanks to Zenpatista)
« Reply #276 on: April 10, 2019, 10:35:08 pm »
Interviewer:  "And the other thing we need to do is increase the capability of our maintenance teams.  We're thinking of about 5 more technicians.  You know people?"

Me:  "Oh, yes, I know people."

IT BEGINS AGAIN, LIKE A PHOENIX RISING FROM ITS OWN POOP.
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Re: The Compleat Billy Chronicles (thanks to Zenpatista)
« Reply #277 on: April 10, 2019, 10:44:19 pm »
I cannot wait for day one. This is for me what sitcoms are for those other people.
“I am that worst of all type of criminal...I cannot bring myself to do what you tell me, because you told me.”

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Re: The Compleat Billy Chronicles (thanks to Zenpatista)
« Reply #278 on: April 11, 2019, 01:26:27 am »
Same.

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Re: The Compleat Billy Chronicles (thanks to Zenpatista)
« Reply #279 on: April 11, 2019, 10:24:37 am »
OMFG YUS.

Zenpatista

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Re: The Compleat Billy Chronicles (thanks to Zenpatista)
« Reply #280 on: April 14, 2019, 07:24:29 pm »
I'm a little concerned about the extent of my excitement for your career. I look forward to your autobiography. It's more exciting than the backhanded compliments and comments where I work.

Doktor Howl

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Re: The Compleat Billy Chronicles (thanks to Zenpatista)
« Reply #281 on: April 14, 2019, 08:23:55 pm »
I'm a little concerned about the extent of my excitement for your career. I look forward to your autobiography. It's more exciting than the backhanded compliments and comments where I work.

You just need to be more horrible.
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Doktor Howl

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Re: The Compleat Billy Chronicles (thanks to Zenpatista)
« Reply #282 on: June 14, 2019, 10:06:58 pm »
The Freak Crew rides again.

I have managed to lower the bar for morality yet again in the job I just accepted today.  Facilities maintenance for a company that builds weapons or something like that.  Needs staffing up, so I am looking to hire Billy, Angry Ed from the refinery days, and a couple of HVAC geeks.

Me:  "So, are you in?"

Billy:  "Fuck yes, I'm in.  When you said it was a morally-bankrupt job, I thought you meant it was connected to health insurance or some shit.  I can do arms manufacturing and not lose a wink of sleep."
"And you don't stop."
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Re: The Compleat Billy Chronicles (thanks to Zenpatista)
« Reply #283 on: June 14, 2019, 11:53:44 pm »
Arms manufacturing is a tough one for me. I love the engineering of firearms, they’re like little puzzle boxes, everything shaped and fit together just right. Then there’s the materials component, the ergonomics, weight considerations (for transport and for recoil), tuning of cycle rate, a billion tiny variables, it appeals to the little puzzle solving monkey in me in a deep, deep way.

If you’re talking about big boy toys, missiles are interesting to me from a propellant chemistry standpoint, and artillery is just really really big guns.

And yet my moral and ethical side won’t let me get involved with something I’d find deeply personally rewarding and lucrative to boot. Not a fan of arming pigs, mass shooters or imperialist bastards. Not criticizing, we all need to eat, it just brought this particular conundrum to the front of my mind.
“I am that worst of all type of criminal...I cannot bring myself to do what you tell me, because you told me.”

Doktor Howl

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Re: The Compleat Billy Chronicles (thanks to Zenpatista)
« Reply #284 on: June 15, 2019, 01:21:52 am »
Arms manufacturing is a tough one for me. I love the engineering of firearms, they’re like little puzzle boxes, everything shaped and fit together just right. Then there’s the materials component, the ergonomics, weight considerations (for transport and for recoil), tuning of cycle rate, a billion tiny variables, it appeals to the little puzzle solving monkey in me in a deep, deep way.

If you’re talking about big boy toys, missiles are interesting to me from a propellant chemistry standpoint, and artillery is just really really big guns.

And yet my moral and ethical side won’t let me get involved with something I’d find deeply personally rewarding and lucrative to boot. Not a fan of arming pigs, mass shooters or imperialist bastards. Not criticizing, we all need to eat, it just brought this particular conundrum to the front of my mind.

If it shovels primates off the planet, I'm really okay with it right now.
"And you don't stop."
- Harry Daghlian

"A penny saved is a penny depreciated."
- Benjamin Franklin