ITT - OFFICIAL VOTING FOR NEW MEXICO

[The Good Reverend Roger]

This whole time I've been under the impression that the second half of the joke was the joke.

Well, one day all this will be yours, Nigel.  As for the moment, I'm fucking off to a convent, to be a Bride of Enrico.  No punchlines for you spags.  At least not til I get knocked off by one of his jealous sex midgets.

That sounds like a punchline just looking for a setup.

SORRY, I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER UNSKINNY BOP AT 11.

TGRR,
Practicing his pole dance for the convent audition.  Has trained his back hair to stand upright on command.

What are these, yeti nuns?

Enrico has standards. 

I want you to imagine Roger doing the Rumpshaker.  In spandex.

Yeah, take THAT to your grave.

Notes:  Somewhere in the second 30 seconds of the song, the oscillations get out of control.

Need new filing cabinet.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

I think The People really wanted the second half of the joke, but were distracted by flashy campaign expenditures.

Well, they can have their glitz.  I shall have the second half of the joke.

Besides, Junkenstien was clearly going to change the poll and the number of votes per person until I lost, and that was funny for a day or so. 

I'm not butthurt, obviously, but I've had 8 hours of sleep in 5 days, and the humor sort of dribbled out of this.

TGGR,

Imma let you finish, but this BULLSHIT about rigging the election MUST CEASE IMMEDIATELY.

ONE-This election has been run in full compliance with the laws of electing a new MEXICO. Ask Hirley0, he drafted the regulations personally.

TWO - Full and open candiate selection is part of the process. You know this. You WANTED this. After your umpteen dozen hissy fits about whether you are even going to share the second part of the joke (Which is increasingly contentious). It is time for a formal decison - Do you wish to be in the short-list of candidates? Do you have the BALLS for an open and honest contest?

THREE - You CISHETREP people disgust me on a deeply personal level. Yet at no stage have I stooped to the many petty personal insults that you have seen fit to pass over this fine upstanding commission. Just reminding you that we are better than you like that.

FOUR - You should be ashamed of yourself. Seeing this fierce competition over the esteemed office of MEXICO you choose to run from the battle. You saw challengers with new, different joke ideas and this scared the living shit out of you. Your face, when you came running into my chambers crying foul and fix will stay with me for a long time. I've not seen that look since the cleaning staff found out that EOC shat in the kettle before leaving. They found out the hard way too. This is not suitable behaviour from a grown man and people expect better from MEXICOs.

FIVE - Following on from the above, the MEXICO elections are free and open to all. Who purchase entry. Thank you for prompt payment of your invoice.

SIX - The shortlist of candidates shall be released MONDAY.

Sleep well you lizard looking son of a bitch.

RIGMMTHAPPGS

Look, take me off the short list and just give my votes to QG or LMNO, and mission accomplished.  The second half of the joke will have been suppressed, as planned...and you took 10% less tries than Florida in 2000 to accomplish this.  Congratulations!

Now, if you'll EXCUSE me, this is my DRESSING ROOM.

[Junkenstein]

Oh no.

No no no.

You don't get away that easily.

You're on the list.

YOU ARE ON ALL THE LISTS.

[Anna Mae Bollocks]

Okay, I'm going to clear a few things up:

1.  The FIRST half of the joke was "I'm running for Mexico, I trust I have your vote."  (Sorry Waffle, I can't help it if you Belgians can't pay attention.)

2.  The SECOND half of the joke is, of course, the punchline to the first part of the joke.

3.  Since The People seem to prefer any given candidate over me and the punchline, then I withdraw my offer of a coalition government, and will not serve in any capacity, as this stopped amusing me at some point early this morning.

4.  Given that, the second half of the joke will be, as I had earlier planned to do, sequestered until after my death, whereupon it will be emailed to Nigel, Stella, and ECH, provided they promise not to tell anyone else.

3. I'm not a People 

4. Promise.

CISHETREP

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Oh no.

No no no.

You don't get away that easily.

You're on the list.

YOU ARE ON ALL THE LISTS.

You asked me.

It is time for a formal decison - Do you wish to be in the short-list of candidates?

Answer:  No.  I can make more money shaking my scaly backside in Enrico's palace.  Give my spot to some other sucker.

[Junkenstein]

Oh no.

No no no.

You don't get away that easily.

You're on the list.

YOU ARE ON ALL THE LISTS.

You asked me.

It is time for a formal decison - Do you wish to be in the short-list of candidates?

Answer:  No.  I can make more money shaking my scaly backside in Enrico's palace.  Give my spot to some other sucker.

Fine, you want Queen G to pimp you out till you're washed up on meth. I get that. Hells, that's MY MEXICAN DREAM.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Oh no.

No no no.

You don't get away that easily.

You're on the list.

YOU ARE ON ALL THE LISTS.

You asked me.

It is time for a formal decison - Do you wish to be in the short-list of candidates?

Answer:  No.  I can make more money shaking my scaly backside in Enrico's palace.  Give my spot to some other sucker.

Fine, you want Queen G to pimp you out till you're washed up on meth. I get that. Hells, that's MY MEXICAN DREAM.

No, you apparently missed the part about Enrico's Pleasure Dome while blinded by graft.

I'm out of the politics game, permanently.

[Junkenstein]

Ah, so like all good ex-reptoid politicians you're back into arms dealing?

Also good. Mexico needs arms. And legs. Any organ really, the market is booming

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Ah, so like all good ex-reptoid politicians you're back into arms dealing?

Also good. Mexico needs arms. And legs. Any organ really, the market is booming

Damn straight.  I can grow 'em back in like 48 hours.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

  Thread delivers.

[Eater of Clowns]

JESUS FUCKIN CHRISTO THIS IS THE GUY WHO DEPOSED ME?  HE CAN'T EVEN COMMIT ELECTION FRAUD RIGHT.

[Eater of Clowns]

FINALLY, someone gets Project Infinite Mexico.

[Junkenstein]

AS OF NOW THE VOTE STANDS AS FOLLOWS
Known self confessed lizard person TGGR
15 (20.3%)
Deposed Mexico EOC, Professes no second part of the Joke.
2 (2.7%)
The Current interim ruling Junta, bored and looking to pass the buck
0 (0%)
I don't get it
1 (1.4%)
I don't care
1 (1.4%)
LMNO - Involved by default.
10 (13.5%)
WAFFLES - Wants to Move Mexico to Belgian waters.
8 (10.8%)
Cainiad - Not really sure what's going on
3 (4.1%)
Pergamos - Joining in
0 (0%)
Queen Gogira - Baking and Tentacles.
15 (20.3%)
Nigel - Pro Handjobs for all
6 (8.1%)
Cardinal Pizza Deliverance - Worried about bad handjobs
4 (5.4%)
V3X - Very enthusiastic about the whole handjob proposal
5 (6.8%)
Stelz - No declared position on anything.
1 (1.4%)
Cain - Already knows who the new MEXICO is anyway
2 (2.7%)
/b/earman - Despicable Drunk
0 (0%)
Elder Ippy - Not making the effort.
1 (1.4%)

THE VOTE SHALL NOW BE RESET TO THE MOST COMPETITIVE CANDIDATES.

CHOOSE WITH CAUTION!

[Junkenstein]

VOTE NOW

RUNDOWN ON FINAL CANDIDATES AT 11.

LITERALLY, LIKE 11. I'VE GOT SHIT TO DO.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Voted for QG.