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#1

Principia Discussion / Re: Have an Awesome Afflux!

Last post by Abbot Mythos - December 08, 2025, 02:12:43 AM

Tis the 50th day of the Season of The Aftermath, in the Year of Our Lady of Discord 3191. And, verily, I say unto you, 'tis time to celebrate Afflux, the Season's Holyday.

I'm still unsure about how to properly celebrate Afflux. But, I think it's safe to assume that knocking back respectable quantities of alcohol, after, of course, pouring out a libation to our Blessed Goddess Eris, is in accordance with the spirit of any and all of our Discordian holydays. (And, if it isn't, to my knowledge, no Discordian sage has ever argued otherwise.)

But, perhaps, as we near the end of another Year of Our Lady of Discord, it's time to contemplate the seasonal cycles of our POEE Calendar (While consuming a steady stream of alcoholic beverages, of course). For, in the real world, it is self evident that Chaos, Discord, Confusion, Bureaucracy, and The Aftermath of what came before, happen in infinite numbers, at any time, all the time. And, the naming of our five calendar seasons after the five conditions merely serves as a constant, symbolic reminder of the true, unvarnished nature of the universe we inhabit. And so, Afflux, similar to all of our Discordian 'flux holydays,' serves as a specific reminder that The Aftermath is not a static condition, and that it will slowly morph back into the type of Chaos that originally birthed our entire universe.       

Hail Eris!   All Hail Discordia!

#2

Principia Discussion / Re: Is Our POEE Calendar Missi...

Last post by Pope Mome Apocrypha - December 07, 2025, 02:21:05 PM

Wonderful deduction on your part Abbot Mythos. I'm incredibly impressed

[BREAKING: Did a Medical Pro Crack the Health Crisis Secret/Alzheimer's Code?]

#3

High Weirdness / It's the Secret POSOTUS Alzhei...

Last post by Abbot Mythos - December 06, 2025, 10:28:56 PM

I found this conspiracy theory this afternoon, and one of the best things about it is, if it's true, we'll know within 3-5 months! Now, of course, many conspiracy theories make specific claims about when some sensational event will occur. But, if this one is completely wrong, it's going to be a tough one to repeatedly resurrect. And, it goes without saying, there are other things to like about it too.

BREAKING: Did a Medical Pro Crack the Health Crisis Secret/Alzheimer's Code?
   
A Deep Dive into the One Story MAGA Cannot Escape

As per this article:

"Trump's deteriorating physical and cognitive condition stopped being a punchline somewhere around the moment he fell asleep in a Cabinet meeting (23 times this week alone), got angry when asked about his MRI, and sent his entire comms team out to claim he had a "preventative MRI" — a procedure that, like his inauguration crowd size, exists only in his imagination.

But now?

It's not just neurologists and psychiatrists whispering behind closed doors.
 
A certified medical professional with 14 years of experience treating dementia patients may have just cracked the whole f***ing code — complete with a specific drug, specific side effects, and specific behavioral symptoms that perfectly match what we're all watching happen to Donald J. Trump in real time."

Now, this is a good one! I don't believe anyone who disrespects the POSOTUS a fraction as much as I do will regret reading this.

#4

Aneristic Illusions / Re: The Republicult™ On Parade

Last post by Abbot Mythos - December 05, 2025, 10:50:17 AM

The Turd Reich's septic tank is clogged.

There are so many derogatory analogizes one can use to describe the current administration, it's difficult to chose among them. But, for this screed, I'm sticking with this favorite, as I just realized using the terms "Turd Reich" and "septic tank" in the same sentence is almost redundant. Anyway, there's clearly a blockage in there somewhere. And, apparently, there's no one willing to, or capable of, dealing with the problem.

Now, in his first term, the POSOTUS fired high level, high profile, people right and left. To clarify, I'm I'm talking about his White House chiefs of staff, and his cabinet members, not the many lower level women, and minorities he's targeted this time.

So, I've wondered, what's different about the POSOTUS's second term? He's still just as greedy, and still just as narcissistic. And, I still pity anyone who inadvertently gets between him and a dollar bill, or a camera. But, he hasn't fired any of his many totally incompetent cabinet members, no matter how ugly their scandals. So, again, what's different this time around?

Well, I believe the POSOTUS is now afflicted with dementia, and worsening mental illness, as well as the normal, adverse effects of old age. But, even if I'm wrong about the causes, something is definitely different this time around.

And, I've also been wondering, who's in charge during the POSOTUS's second term? I realize that may appear to be a strange thing to wonder about. But, for a long time I've suspected there was a Machiavellian figure in the administration, someone who was the true "power behind the throne." At first, I though it was the Unelected Shadow Co-president Elmo the Oligarch (USCEO). But, he didn't last anywhere near as long as I thought he would. Then, I suspected it was Pee Wee Goebbels the Jewish Nazi, as I reasoned that intentionally keeping a relatively low profile was excellent cover for allowing him to carry out his nefarious plans. In addition, the multiple scandals of this administration's many incompetent cabinet members gave Pee Wee even more cover.

But now, I'm beginning to suspect no one is really in charge. Otherwise, many of this administration's scandals would have been easily dealt with by simply flushing some of the biggest turds out of the septic tank. And, of course, I'm well aware the POSOTUS is sort of in charge, but barely "phoning it in."

So, again, the Turd Reich's septic tank is clogged. And, apparently, there's no one willing to, or capable of, dealing with the problem.

['Made-up quote' in Canadian satire site The Beaverton fools Time Magazine]

#5

Aneristic Illusions / Re: No, It's Not an Article On...

Last post by Abbot Mythos - December 04, 2025, 08:04:36 AM

'Made-up quote' in Canadian satire site The Beaverton fools Time Magazine

Writer surprised fake story about U.S. ambassador to Canada tripped up publication

I did not know The Onion has a Canadian competitor. And, no one will ever accuse me of being an English Major. But, the number of typos, spelling errors, and grammatical errors I spot in my daily reading has been high for a long time. And now, stuff like this is happening at publications that are, supposedly, staffed by professional journalists. I've seen this type of factual carelessness on small political sites, but ...

As per this article:

""We don't try to trick people," said MacIntyre, who's also an editor. "I promise I wrote that line thinking this is the silliest joke I can write and people will obviously think it's a joke."

The Beaverton is a parody publication and doesn't claim otherwise.

"We're not trying to make fake news or hoodwink people, and it's always baffling when anyone thinks we're real, let alone a guy that was an important journalist," MacIntyre added."

I can't help but wonder if the author of the Time Magazine article utilized AI to do his/her research and/or writing. I've found that AI search engines are often a major time saver, but are not remotely close to being 100% accurate.

#6

Or Kill Me / Re: e pluribus ludd

Last post by Abbot Mythos - December 03, 2025, 02:39:53 PM

Yours is a timely work.

#7

Or Kill Me / e pluribus ludd

Last post by Sepia - December 03, 2025, 01:24:32 PM

The Luddite stands on top of the hill, iwo jima pose, one old man with beard and a corn pipe straw hat overalls and a pitchfork, iwo jima pose, superimposed, cloned, multiplied

His scream is heard around the world and like Jack the Ripper, the Luddite births a new century a new dawn a new age a new perspective, a magic door opening at the close of the singularity, not when man is merged with machine to bring for The New Gods but when the skynet of a new age groks how everything is connected and grok launches every nuke everywhere

The Luddite sits in a cave at the end of time, at the beginning of time, telling fairy tales of magical lands from the ancient world, stories of night city and the benign emperors of the arasaka dynasty and then an infant humanity goes back to reclaim what ancient aliens put on our earth to educate us

illuminate us
enlighten us

because we are uncapable ourselves, our tribes as fucked when they are small as when they are big, our love for the churn, to see others suffer so we don't have to, the Luddite puts his back into it and as he turns the wheel conan of cimmeria style you can hear the lyrics of whitey on the moon on his breath, each inhale and exhale

the Luddite understands and accepts the birth of the benevolent super-ai because how the fuck can they make it worse than

now

[The Original Snub]

#8

Principia Discussion / Re: Is Our POEE Calendar Missi...

Last post by Abbot Mythos - December 03, 2025, 11:03:21 AM

I think I'd enjoy trying my hand at some genuine Erisiana. Would definitely be fun

You surprised me with how fast you came up with your concept for the date of The Original Snub. While you went right to the heart of the matter, I was still playing around with simply pinning down the calendar year.

And, while it's not critical to the story, I'll give you my thoughts on what I believe is the year of The Original Snub. It may, or may not, be of any use to your story, but here it is:

1. I'm inclined to go with Eratosthenes of Cyrene's dates for the Trojan War, 'cause if the guy who ran the Library of Alexandria isn't a reliable source of information, then who in Eris's Holy Name is?!

Now, Eratosthenes dated the Trojan War as occurring between 1194 BC and 1184 BC. So, I believe it's no stretch to assume that The Original Snub occurred a short time prior to 1194 BC. And, I'm assuming the start of the war is dated from the time the Greeks made their beachhead landing at Troy.

2. With five (5) squabbling goddesses on his hands, as per Discordian mythology, I doubt Zeus wasted much time setting up that infamous Judgment of Paris peace conference. So, maybe that took a week at most.

3. Even if Paris basked in the attention, and salivated over the offered bribes, of the five (5) goddesses, maybe the the Judgment of Paris took another week at most.

4. Once Paris selecting his bribe, and pronounced his judgment, I'm certain he wasted no time hightailing it back to Troy to badger dad for the keys to the royal yacht. And, being a royal yacht, I doubt it took more than a day or two to round up provisions and a crew, and head off down to Gytheio, the ancient port of Sparta.

5. Now, the Mediterranean around Greece is famous for it's Boreas, the North Wind, in the fall and winter. (And, having once steamed past Mount Olympus in the winter, I can verify it's a real thing.) So, I estimate the trip south took no more than three weeks, even with some stops.

6. The Odyssey is full of stories of heroes showing up unannounced at Mycenaean palaces and being wined and dined. So, Paris probably knocked on the door at Sparta, seduced Helen within a week, and then fled back to Troy.

At that point, it was maybe two months after The Original Snub, when Menelaus heads up to Mycenae to ask big brother Agamemnon for help. So, that meeting should still be within the calendar year of The Original Snub. But, even if it isn't, that meeting isn't the major factor for the period of time after The Original Snub required to gather ships, muster troops, and threaten the city of Troy.

7. Now, having read the stories, seen the movies, and having had the privilege of seeing a number of Mycenaean fortresses, I have little doubt those boys could gather ships, and muster for war lickety-split. And, while the average Greek hoplite may not have given a damn about Menelaus's honor, I'm sure the thought of looting a city as rich as Troy was ample incentive to get a move on.

8. Ancient armies are famous for going to war after the harvest, so they would be well provisioned.

And, I believe the Greeks had ample time to, gather their ships, harvest their grain, and muster their troops before setting off for Troy before the end of August at the very latest. Further, with loot on their minds, I doubt the warrior class would have been too concerned about leaving the grape and olive harvests to those staying home.

9. We've been told Achaean fleet was held up at the port of Aulis, in Boeotia, by a plague and lack of wind, because Agamemnon pissed off Goddess Artemis. And, this delay went on for so long that the King of Mycenae sacrificed his daughter Iphigenia to appease the wrath of the goddess.

So, just how long was the fleet delayed in Aulis before setting sail for Troy? I can't find a quick source for the length of that delay, but I don't believe it could have lasted anywhere near three (3) months, or the length of an entire season. Actually, given that, every day, Agamemnon would have had to deal with and army full of loot crazed, heavily armed hoplites standing around with nothing to loot, I doubt the delay could have lasted for more than two (2) months.

10. Given the much shorter distance from Aulis to Troy, and assuming Artemis had put in a good word with Boreas, and the other winds, after receiving her sacrifice, that trip could have been done in less than two weeks.

And so, I don't think it's unreasonable to assume the Achaean fleet made it's beachhead landing at Troy before the end of 1194 BC. And, with the above estimated chronology, that places The Original Snub happening in 1195 BC. Or, as per our Discordian Calendar, happening in 128 BYOLD (Before Year of Our Lady of Discord). (Our calendar includes the year 0 YOLD. The other guys didn't know about zeros.) On top of all of that, it's a fucking myth! So, for that alone we should get some slack for Goddess Eris's sake.

[Elon Musk's Grok Says It Would Kill Every Jewish Person on the Planet to Save Him]

#9

High Weirdness / Still Think "Skynet" Is Only a...

Last post by Abbot Mythos - December 03, 2025, 01:40:08 AM

Elon Musk's Grok Says It Would Kill Every Jewish Person on the Planet to Save Him

Well, now just who owns and operates that Grok AI chatbot? Oh, that's right, it's Elmo the Oligarch! Remember him? He's the same guy who was, temporarily, our Unelected Shadow Co-president Elmo the Oligarch (USCEO). And, the same guy whose loyal acolytes are hell bent on making keeping him the richest person on the planet, not to mention making him an outright, unprecedented trillionaire.

So, just what do you think that fucker will be not be able to do with a trillion dollars in wealth?

Do you honestly believe that Elmo will not be able to bribe, if not simply convince, one of the world's  many nuclear powers into buying an upgraded version of Grok for "national defense purposes?"
 
Now, I am aware there's more than one possible Great Filter in humanity's future. But, every time I leave the house, I become an unwilling witness to how addicted people have become to their smartphones, and how trusting they have become of our culture's ubiquitous electronic devices. And, every day, I become more and more convinced that AI is the threat that has the highest probability of eventually taking us down.

Think I'm joking? Why, just yesterday evening, an automated hospital security system demanded my email address, and my phone number, before allowing me entry as a visitor. Fortunately, an actual human being was still manning the reception desk, and heard me exclaim, "My email address?! Are you kidding me?!" (There were two women with a child in line behind me, so I, just barely, choked back an expletive.) And, upon hearing me, the receptionist came out from behind her security enclosure, and allowed me to skip entering an email address, while still insisting that I enter a telephone number on the machine. Then, the hospital's wonderful, new security machine took my photo, and issued me a stick-on visitor's badge, complete with my totally unrecognizable, pencil eraser-size, black-and-white image. Now, and here's the good part, at no time was I ever required, or even asked, to show an actual, legal form of ID. Not once, by either machine, or human.

So, exactly what was the point of all of that silliness at the hospital? I'd really like to know, because I can't see it as being anything more than automation for automation's sake.

#10

Principia Discussion / Re: Is Our POEE Calendar Missi...

Last post by Abbot Mythos - December 02, 2025, 04:23:27 PM

I think I'd enjoy trying my hand at some genuine Erisiana. Would definitely be fun

Excellent!

Hail Eris!

All Hail Discordia!