ITT: Best Posts of the Day

[hoopla]

Worshipping a god of sarcasm?

Oh yeah, great idea.

[Bu🤠ns]

you  have to claw yourself through the zombie masses first, though.

i heard some of them are even cyborg zombies. They move around in strange carts, their bodies mutated into horrible nameless shapes, the muffled, maddening beating of the drums and thin, monotonous horns of blasphemous music, the crackling tinny voices coming from behind the walls of the blind, voiceless, mindless gargoyles from mouths that are no mouths.

[LMNO]

3. If you were to sort all Gods into five or six categories, what would those categories be? For example: Love, War, Nature, Wealth, Trickery, Sovereign. (function: same as above)

up, down, charm, strange, top, and bottom

[Jenne]

Not so much wrath, as boredom.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Not so much wrath, as boredom.

FUCKING PHOTOBUCKET.   

[Jenne]

Aw, I see it fine.  Your permissions are not set to stun.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Aw, I see it fine.  Your permissions are not set to stun.

Now I see it.  A minute ago, I was getting the "this pic violates our prudish little behinds" image.

[Jenne]

Aw, I see it fine.  Your permissions are not set to stun.

Now I see it.  A minute ago, I was getting the "this pic violates our prudish little behinds" image.

I can see its point, with all due consideration.

[Bu🤠ns]

Aw, I see it fine.  Your permissions are not set to stun.

Now I see it.  A minute ago, I was getting the "this pic violates our prudish little behinds" image.

I can see its point, with all due consideration.

I like to imagine their faces when it randomly pops up.

[Shibboleet The Annihilator]

You made it into the top 10, you can quit spamming the place now

OMG! SERIOULSY TOP TEN! I'M SOFA KING EXCITED! WOW! WHAT AN HONOR TO BE TOP 10! I FEEL SO HAPPY I COULD TAKE A DUMP ON YOUR CHEST!

Yeah, I just POTD'd myself.

[Cain]

It was pretty funny.  The bit about stickying posts was an excellent rejoinder, too.

[Shibboleet The Annihilator]

Kinda makes me want to put my pee-stained dentures back in.

[Cain]

400 pounds is nothing.  I have seen 600 pound monstrosities that are confined to specially reinforced Rascal Scooters, like Captain Pike crossed with a Zeppelin.

you should post blurry pictures of those to UFO crankpot sites.

[Suu]

Mustache wax is not available to the general public.  One day you will be walking down the street and a well dressed older gentleman will approach you and hand you a card that appears to made out of graphite.  On it will be an address.  It will invariably be for a basement with a heavy rich wooden door, a wrought iron railing, and stone stairs.  At the door you will be requested to present the card and your mustache is inspected.  Within you will find waxes ranging from the exotic to the everyday with a variety of scents, hand carved miniature grooming devices, and shears forged of Damascus steel.

They will accept no payment other than the card you've been given, and you are expected to take only that which you require.  Should you return, you'll find the location boarded up and long abandoned.

[Shibboleet The Annihilator]

Twofer from Crazy Prepared:

guns freak me out.

That's probably a reasonable, measured response to anything that can put glory holes in you.

Did I say glory holes?

Yeah, kinda.

guns freak me out.

hoplophobia can be cured through exposure.
if you're in north TX sometime, ring me up, and we'll have fun with extreme prejudice.  I'll even break out the Barrett and Tannerite....